Tactics Series 2
Check and Mate
By Kadith and Cat
NC-17

Disclaimer: I think we all know the drill by now...

One year later

Round One

B'Elanna stared absently at Kathryn as she drained the last of her TropicalPassion, heavy on the everclear. From somewhere off the wall she foundherselfasking, "Have you ever thought about just stripping naked, dancing in frontofa view port, then finding a man and screwing like animals all night?"

Kathryn blinked, poured herself another glass, then smiled, "Who needs tothink about it when you have Chakotay around to make sure you actually doit."

B'Elanna smiled slowly, "So the rumors are true.."

Kathryn froze for a moment, "Oh shit."

B'Elanna started laughing, "That about covers it I'd say, it's all right,your secret is safe with me. Of course, it's not like I'll remember anythingin the morning anyway."

Kathryn shrugged and knocked back another drink, "True."

B'Elanna waited for a few minutes, then groaned, "So do I get details ornot??"

Kathryn's smile was slow and wicked, "Well..." She leaned forward and begandetailing one such instance...not sparing any of the details. It was the endof this tale that Chakotay and Tom heard as they entered the holodeck insearch of the now drunken ladies. "So there I was, spread eagle against theview port, so damned close I could taste it, and he looks at me and asks ifI'm really sure about this. I could have killed him."

The younger woman arched a brow, "What did you do?"

Kathryn leaned back, "I said, 'What the hell do you think Tattoo boy!"

At that moment Tom and Chakotay's presence was made known as Tom doubledoverin laughter, "Tattoo boy? Oh, that's a good one, wait til the crew hearsaboutthis one!"

Chakotay glowered, "Kathryn, you swore you'd never say that in public."

She looked down in mock shame, "Whoops, my bad."

Chakotay headed for his tipsy lover, and slowly sank in a chair next to her.He leaned forward until his arms were resting on the table. Bringing hishands up, he steepled them and studied her intently for a few moments. Amischievous glint appeared in his eyes. "So...we're telling tales arewe...Let me see...." He grinned as Tom sat down next to B'Elanna. "Maybe Ishould tell them about your...." He was stopped suddenly as Kathryn's handclamped over his mouth.

"I don't think so." She said all too quickly.

Tom and B'Elanna were quick to lean forward with interest, "Oh?" they askedinunison. "Do tell," Tom finished.

Chakotay lowered Kathryn's hand and held both of hers in his, "Well, it'slike this..."

Kathryn glared at him in a panic. "Do it Commander and you'll be sleepingalone in you own quarters."

Chakotay studied her a moment to see if she was serious. His eyes noted thepinkening blush around her ears and face. He glanced down at her handslacedwith his and calculated about how long it would take him to get back in hergood graces. After a long sigh, he leaned back and watched the expectantgroup. "She has this absolutely fascinating little tattoo on her innerthigh.It's a tiny pink heart with the words, 'bite me' inscribed in the center."

Kathryn pulled her hands away and slid down in her seat, covering hercrimsonface, "I can't believe you just said that." She took a deep breath, "Youleaveme no choice Chakotay but to…" she looked at Tom and B'Elanna, "If youtickleChakotay in the right spot, and oh yes, he's ticklish, his leg starts tojerklike a puppy's." She flashed Chakotay a smile.

"Sounds like you're declaring war, my love. Shall I tell them about thewonderful things you say when we make love?"

"As if you hear them, you're usually too busy grunting and groaning to hearanything I might say." She snorted.

Chakotay narrowed his eyes, "Does, 'Oh god, don't ever stop' ring a bell?Andyes, I believe there was, 'Oh please, oh god, yes right there, Aaaaaieeeee,"he imitated a shrill scream.

Kathryn snorted, "Riiiiiiiiight, in your dreams stud."

Chakotay grinned, "Well at least you admit that much."

"Hmmph!"

"There's also the 'Whose turn is it to be tied up?' and the 'Ride'mCowboy!"

Kathryn choked on her drink, as Tom and B'Elanna giggled. "CHA-KO-TAY!"

"And, we can't forget your fascination with leather now can we?"

"You no good Bullshit artist. I have never...."

He grinned, "Yeah, I know, but I wouldn't mind trying it out with you,Honey."

"Fat chance of that now," she stood up, wobbling a little in her efforts tovacate the holodeck. "You're sleeping alone tonight tattoo boy." She tossedher head and harrumphed as she headed for the exit.

Chakotay just grinned after her and winked at Tom, "She always says that,butshe never follows through."

"I heard that," Kathryn called back just before the doors slid shut behindher.

"I guess I better go make nice nice. After all, I like my current sleepingarrangements." Chakotay stopped to hug B'Elanna briefly, and clapped Tom onthe back before following Kathryn out of the Holodeck. He caught up withheron the way to the turbolift. "Kath, Honey, you know I was only teasing."

"It's not going to work. You worked your foot into your mouth and bit downonit. Now you can deal with it." She nodded her head decisively as shestumbled into the lift.

"Kathryn, I do believe you are drunk."

"You amaze me sometimes Chakotay. You have an unfailing ability to statetheobvious. However, I am not drunk, just a little tipsy."

She stumbled into his arms just as she uttered the last word. Chakotaychuckled as he caught her and drew her up against him, "Well, whatever itis,I think I like it."

Kathryn rolled her eyes, "Just like a man, always trying to score."

"Who said anything about trying?" As if to prove his point one of his handsslid up then under her short skirt, skimming the inside of her thigh.

Kathryn sucked in a breath, "It's not going to work."

"So you keep telling me, but your body, and a lovely one it is too, istellingme otherwise." His hands skimmed her center briefly, testing the dampnessthere. He grinned as she shivered in his arms. "Computer, halt turbolift."He leaned down and captured her mouth with his.

She moaned into his mouth and let herself melt into him for just a moment,before pulling back and calling for the computer to resume the lift. "Youheard me Chakotay, I can't believe you told them all that."

He sighed and turned her around, "Kathryn, number one they both know we werejust teasing, and only half of it's true. And number 2, by morning, neitherofthem will remember a damned word either of us said."

She pulled away from him, pouting a little, "I still can't believe you saidit." She just was not going to let him win.

"You're just pouting because I told them the truth in some of that. Faceit,you do beg and demand quite well. I'm certainly not complaining. Besides,Ididn't tell them how you purr and moan when I hit just the right spot."

Kathryn punched him in the arm. "You are too sure of yourself Mister.Personally I think a few nights on the proverbial sofa will do you somegood."She turned quickly and headed to her quarters as the turbolift doors opened.

Chakotay snorted as he casually followed her, "Right, last time you triedthatyou didn't survive 15 minutes, it'll be interesting to see how far you cangothis time."

Kathryn tossed him a look as she entered her quarters, locking the doorbehindher, "I guess we'll just see," She said to herself once inside. Of course,she'd forgotten he had the override and within seconds was pushing heragainstthe wall, damn it. If she was ever going to win she'd have to do somethingabout the damned override!

Chakotay growled as he wedged her between the wall and himself, "Haven't youlearned by now Kath, you'll never be able to lock me out again." She onlybucked against him in answer.

She brought her hands up to push him away, but he caught them in one bighandand drew them over her head. He grinned as he leaned down. "Mine!" Hismouth closed over hers, urging her lips apart, and dueling with her tongue.He quickly shifted position, bringing his body closer and sliding his thighbetween hers, and pressing against her.

Any thought of resistance fled Kathryn's brain as Chakotay's mouth claimedhers. The wonderful sensations coursing through her body quickly quietedtherandom outraged thoughts. As he moved closer, she couldn't stop the moanthatescaped her lips.

Chakotay smiled as he worked his way across her cheek to the sensitive spotbehind her ear. "Not even a minute this time, Kathryn."

The arrogant whisper filtered through her haze at the same time his mouthonceagain merged with hers. A brief flash of temper shot through her,overridingthe pleasure of the moment. Without another thought, Kathryn bit down hardonhis tongue. "Arrogant, tattoo carrying jerk!"

The bite and her body bucking against him threw Chakotay off balance. Hequickly released his hands and tried to center himself. It didn't work. Assoon as Kathryn's hands were free, she pushed him, and he tumbled to thefloor.

Chakotay sighed heavily when he heard the tell tale signs of her locking herbedroom door behind her. Well, he was really going to have to kiss ass thistime. Then a slow, wicked smile spread across his face, two could play thisgame, and he began to wonder how long it would take for Kathryn to admitdefeat. Oh she could be stubborn all right, but so could he.

Working quickly, Chakotay keyed in the overrides to her bedroom. Grinningslightly, he entered. He almost expected her to be waiting for him.Disappointment flashed briefly over his face as he caught site of her curledaround her pillow, sound asleep. He watched her sleep for a few momentswhena sudden wave of tenderness swept through him. Kneeling by the bed, hebrushed the hair from her face. He noticed the tired lines framing hereyes.With a soft sigh, he slipped from his clothes. Pulling the covers back, heslid into bed beside her, and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her backagainst him, spoon fashion. Her sigh of contentment, and the relaxing ofherbody spoke volumes. He closed his eyes and snuggled her closer, kissing thetop of her head. Smiling slightly to himself, he whispered, "You win thisround, Love." Content for the moment, he drifted off to sleep with his lifein his arms.

Round Two

Kathryn Janeway sat in her ready room. Her head was cradled in her hands,and the headache was pounding so insistently, that she thought she'd be sick.Growling slightly in frustration, she stood slowly and made her way to thereplicator. "Coffee, black." She winced at the sound of her own voice, butshe refused to go see the Doc and have him lecture her for her reckless use ofreal alcohol instead of the standard synthehol. She sat again at her desk,set the mug down, and held her head once more. *What the hell had she andB'Elanna drank last night?* Wincing again as she shifted in her chair, sheglared at the wall in general. "Computer dim lights one-quarter." As thelights dimmed, she nodded in satisfaction only to groan as the pain shotthrough her head. *Bloody Hell!* Her eyes closed, and she inhaled thesoothing smell of coffee. Lifting the cup to take a sip, she jerked when thechime sounded, then groaned.

"Come!" As Chakotay walked in she scowled at his cheery smile. "What so youwant?"

"My my aren't we in a pleasant mood this morning?"

"Is there a point to your visit?"

"Actually, I wanted to discuss last night with you." He grinnedmischievously.

Kathryn couldn't stop another wince from flitting across her face. Damn butshe wished she couldn't remember last night. He looked a little cocky. Shewasn't in the mood.

"Go away, Chakotay."

"Now Kath, is that anyway to treat the man who loves you."

"Yes, go away."

"Love you too, babe."

She shot him the 'glare of death'. He saw the pain in her eyes and took pityon her. "Actually, I brought you something."

Kathryn's eyes narrowed briefly.

Chakotay smiled, flashing his dimples. He came forward and pulled a hyposprayfrom behind his back. "I slipped into sickbay this morning and flitched thisfrom the doctor. It should take care of that hangover you've got."

It was on the tip of her tongue to tell him to go to hell, she didn't have ahangover, but the promise of relief was too great. She tipped her head to theside to allow him access to her neck. Her only concession.

Chakotay moved behind her and pressed the hypospray to her neck. He couldn'thelp but smile as she sighed in relief. His hands slid to her shoulders,tentatively massaging the tense muscles. He couldn't believe he actually feltguilty for allowing her to suffer. She'd only been up and on duty for alittle over two hours.

Kathryn sighed as his hands glided over her shoulders and neck. She leanedback into him, allowing herself to relax into his touch.

Chakotay knew he'd pay later, but he couldn't help himself. Leaning down, henuzzled her ear, nibbling slightly on the lobe. As she moaned softly, heallowed his lips to trail down the side of her throat. Slowly he worked hisway back up and over her cheek, until his lips found hers. Lingering there,he played her mouth and tongue in a leisurely kiss. He broke the kiss andworked his way back to her ear. "You are too easy, My Love."

Kathryn stiffened beneath his hands and growled. Chakotay was already slidingout the door as her coffee mug went flying.

Of course he'd expected it, and had ducked at the right moment. But that wasunlucky for Tuvok who ended up covered in hot coffee. Chakotay chuckled andcalled out to the bridge crew, "Guess who is in a bad mood?"

Tuvok arched a brow as he moved away from his console and into the turbo lift,"The Captain, obviously."

Tom smirked, "Wonder why." 

He was answered by a deep growl as Kathryn marched out of her ready room andtook her command seat, sending Chakotay a glare. "Well if you'll shut up andman your station, you won't have anything to worry about, will you LT. Paris."She put great emphasis on his rank, a usual sign that he was about to bedemoted. Chakotay had to bite his lip to keep from chuckling, if anyone wouldget the brunt of her mood, it would be Tom, the poor sap.

Kathryn sat, silently fuming. There had to be something she could do to geteven with Chakotay, but what? The silence on the bridge was deafening.Finally, Kathryn turned the bridge over to Chakotay and once again disappearedinto her ready room. Chakotay also followed suit by turning the bridge overto Tuvok, and heading for his office. 

As the two most senior officers left the bridge, Tom and Harry both let out asigh of relief.

Kathryn sat in her ready room and plotted. It was time to teach that big oafa lesson all right. Now all she had to do was figure out how.

Round Three

After thinking for nearly an hour, she decided what she would do. She slippedout of her ready room and headed for Chakotay's office. Upon entering, shewalked up to his desk, a serious expression on her face. "We need to talk."

He looked up and nodded, pretty sure where this conversation was going to go.

She came around in front of him, sitting on the edge, her legs brushingagainst his. "You have got to stop arousing me to the point of insanity onour duty shifts. I give. You can do it. I can't resist and frankly I don'twant to. What do you say?"

Chakotay couldn't stop the grin that spread across his face. "Anything youwant Captain." 

Her hands slid forward to caress his face. She shifted off the desk and downto the floor, kneeling between his thighs. She pushed herself closer to him,wrapping her arms around his waist and resting her head on his chest. "I wantyou to finish what you started earlier."

It only took a moment for her words to register. His hands reached down andpulled her into his lap. His mouth caught hers in a searing kiss. Herfingers trailed down his body teasing the erection pressing against herthighs. She quickly had his trousers unfastened and continued to play withhim. She slid off his lap, and enveloped him with her mouth. His fingerstangled in her hair as she continued to work him with her mouth and tongue.He was so close…

"Tuvok to Captain Janeway"

"Janeway here"

"Captain, I believe you asked me to remind you of our meeting."

"Thank you Tuvok, I'll be right there."

With an impish smile, Kathryn rose gracefully and headed for the door. Shecouldn't resist the taunt at Chakotay's expression. "Guess we'll have tofinish this later, hmmm?" She exited the room before he could move. 

He growled, two could play this game, and oh yes, it was a game alright. Hestraightened his uniform and refastened it, now how to get even? A thoughtsprang into his head, it was evil, it bordered cruel, then he laughed, but ohshe deserved it. 

Round Four

He left his office, casting her a glare as he passed her sitting in hercommand chair like a queen at her throne. He entered the turbolift and leanedagainst the wall, yes, she definitely deserved this. He went over the detailsin his mind, the things he'd need, he knew she'd be off duty soon, so he'dhave to hurry if he wanted to get everything set up. When he exited theturbolift he stopped into his quarters long enough to grab his medicinebundle, his akunah, though he didn't think he'd need it, and an herbal tea mixthat his people had used for centuries as a natural aphrodisiac. Then he tookthe items next door, to her cabin. He spread the medicine bundle out and laythe akuna on the stand next to the bed, then he retrieved her precious ceramiccoffee pot and brewed the tea. By the time she entered the cabin, the aromafilled each and every room. 

Kathryn blinked when she entered her quarters, the lights were dimmed, candleswhere set up everywhere, and something smelled awfully good. When she sawChakotay hunched over a tray she began to feel guilty for her little stuntearlier, he'd gone to all this trouble for her. She smiled when he turnedaround, not noticing the gleam in his eyes.

"That really smells great. What is it?"

"A family tea recipe. I hope you'll like it." He kept his voice carefullyneutral as he handed her a cup. "Ready for dinner?"

"Ummm hmmm." Kathryn sipped the tea, allowing the flavor to coat her tongue.Holding the cup carefully, she moved to the table, and sat. As she watchedChakotay fill her plate and refill her cup, guilt washed over her. Here shehad played that petty trick to get back at him earlier, and now he was beingwonderful. Tears clogged her throat as she thought about it. 

They chatted lightly through the meal. Kathryn was startled to find that shehad finished off the tea, and Chakotay hadn't even gotten a cup. "I'm sorry,Chakotay. I didn't even share."

His eyes had an odd gleam as he responded. "Think nothing of it. As long asyou enjoyed it, I'm happy. Besides, I brewed it just for you."

She smiled again, guilt once more washing over her. "I'm sorry for the prankthis afternoon. It was rather low of me to do it." 

The sincerity in her eyes and voice took his breath away. Now guilt washedover him. Damned if he hadn't let her drink four cups of that tea. He closedhis eyes briefly. "Why don't you go in a get comfortable while I clean up?"As he watched her leave his mind began to race. He couldn't take her to thedoctor, that would raise too many questions. A slight smile tugged on thecorner of his mouth. *Guess I'll have to take care of the problem myself.Gods but its going to be a long night.* At that final thought, he grinnedeven bigger. *Looks like she wins again.*

Then he started to think about it a little more, she always won. Never oncesince they'd been together had he actually managed to win, well, this was onetime that he was going to. He may not leave her to suffer, but he wasdefinitely going to take his time, making her beg would be enough to satisfyhis revenge. 

He put the dishes in the recycler and blew out the candles lining the diningroom and covering the table. Then he walked over to where she was, shiftinguncomfortably on the sofa. He grinned, the tea was already beginning to work.He sat in the corner of the sofa and pulled her to lean against his chest sohe could rub her shoulders.

Kathryn bit her lip, his hands combined with the warm breath on her neck,caused the fire beginning to grow within her to become more intense. Shemoaned when she felt his lips moving against the side of her neck, his handshad moved downward from her shoulders and were now snaking around her waist.She felt them spread across her stomach and inch upward slowly, then theystopped, and his thumbs began to just lightly brush the undersides of herbreasts.

Kathryn turned into him. "We've been playing these games too long, Chakotay.I want you now." She pushed him back on the couch and leaned down for a kiss,straddling his body as she went. Her hands worked quickly to divest him ofhis clothing. All rational thought and ideas of revenge fled his mind as hejoined her in her frantic quest to rid them both of their clothing. Theirjoining was swift and frenzied, and when the crest swept over them, they laypanting in each others arms. 

Kathryn lay tucked in the crook of his arm, her body draped lazily over him.She lay quietly, reflecting on the last few days, when the sexual tension andanticipation began to build in her lower body. It shocked her becauseChakotay wasn't even doing anything to cause it. They had both just engagedin the most energetic sex since they became a couple. It had been fast,furious and explosive, and she wanted him again. She was unable to stop theunconscious shifting of her body into his. "Uhhmm, Chakotay?"

He blinked a moment, and wondered if he were up to the task ahead of him. "Iknow, Love. Give me a minute and I'll take care of you."

A warning bell went off in Kathryn's brain. "You know what, exactly." Shelevered herself up on his chest, her eyes widening in surprise as sexualtremors snaked through her body. "You did something to me didn't you?"

"Now Kathryn, I was just trying to get back at you for the stunt you pulled inmy office."

"What did you do?" She pushed herself off of him and backed away, trying toignore the little pulses of pleasure flashing through her body.

"I gave you a natural aphrodisiac. It has and will continue to heighten yoursexual awareness and pleasure. The thing is, you've consumed much more than Iintended. This may last most of the night." His eyes were a combination ofapology and anticipation. He stood and held out his hand. "Don't worry, Iwill help you through this."

She stormed away from him, anger radiating through her. "I can't believe youdrugged me. You can go to hell, Chakotay. I'll take care of the problemmyself." She fled into her bedroom, and quickly locked the door. It didn'tlast though. Chakotay soon had the overrides in place and was watching her asshe tossed on the bed, trying to deny the feelings pulsing through her.

"Not this time, Love. I caused this, I'll fix it." He knelt beside her onthe bed, gently taking her hand in his. 

At the first touch of his lips, Kathryn's resolve crumbled. Even without thedrug, she wanted him. She simply allowed him to have his way. 

The night played out in a series of intimate kisses and caresses that broughtthem both to new heights of pleasure. Morning found them wrapped in oneanother, tired, but complete, and ready to begin a new day.

Round Five

Kathryn rounded the bend in the corridor that would lead her to the messhall.She smiled to herself as she thought of how she'd left Chakotay that morning.She'd stolen every towel from the bathroom while he'd been in the shower, andtaken his clothes, then she'd over-ridden his ability to do a sight to sighttransport to his quarters. She chuckled, what she had left him with had beenher robe, the peach satin one. 

She was still smiling when she entered the messhall, she nodded in greeting tothose she passed. Then she noticed him sitting at their table, he didn't looktoo happy to see her, so she decided to bypass him for the moment and headedfor Neelix's serving counter. As she neared it she noticed the grotesque smellthat was coming from the kitchen, and for the second time that day her stomachbegan churning. She bit her lip and tried to ignore it, telling herself thatif she didn't at least eat 'something' Chakotay would be on her back aboutthat as well. She smirked again, she was really going to have to do somethingabout the images she got from just simple thoughts of that man. 

She stepped up to the counter and smiled, "So Neelix, what's for lunch today?"

"Ah Captain, I think it's something you're going to like." The little mansmiled and brought over the skillet. He practically shoved it under her nose,"It's sort of a combination of leola root, talaxian tomatoes, and squid." 

Kathryn had to take a step back, the sight and smell where just too much. "Uh,I think I'll pass Neelix." She felt her breakfast rising, "Um, I have somereports to work on anyway, so I'll get something in my ready room." If it hadbeen possible for her to leave any faster she would have. She barely made itout of the messhall and into the turbolift before she sank to her knees,taking deep breaths to steady herself. "God what is wrong with me?" shecroaked. She waited a few minutes before rising to her feet, then leanedheavily against the wall of the turbolift and ordered it to take her to thebridge.

*~*~*~*

Chakotay's eyes narrowed when he saw her come in, then he smirked when he sawher circle around him, "Coward" he mumbled. He was definitely going to get herfor that little prank she'd pulled this morning. He was going to get her good.It was just his luck that when he'd finally decided to don her robe and walkdown the corridor to his own quarters that Tom had been passing by. He wasnever going to be able to live this down. Oh yes, she was going to pay allright, but how? He decided for now he'd ignore it, make her think everythingwas all right before dropping it on her. He grin widened, he definitely likedthat idea. 

He watched her out of the corner of his eye as she stepped up to the counter,at least she was going to eat, even if she was 45 minutes late for lunch. Heshifted in his seat so he could see her better, he watched as Neelix shovedthe skillet into her face, was that panic he read in her stance? It was! Sheturned around and practically ran, and her face--if she could have turnedphysically green she would have. Well he thought, she deserved it! Hechuckled and finished his meal, he'd tease her about it later, after he madesure she'd eaten 'something'. Then he frowned as two ensigns walked by, peoplewere speculating just a little freely these days. "Did you see the Captain?"One had said.

"Yeah," the other, Ericks he thought was her name. "You know, if I didn't knowbetter, I'd think she was pregnant." Her friend laughed and they walked onpast, leaving the messhall.

Chakotay rose after they'd left, his good mood dampened. It wasn't thatspeculation bothered him, he just wished it was true. But he knew it wouldnever happen, she'd never agree to it, or let it happen. He wasn't really evensure that she wanted children, they'd never talked about it, and he reallycouldn't see her not having them were circumstances different. He wonderedabout asking her, but decided not to, he might scare her off, and things werejust too good right now.

*****

Chakotay walked into the ready room at her okay. Walking up to her desk, hesat on the edge, and stared down at her. She still looked a little pale."You didn't eat any lunch. How about I replicate you a sandwich?" He wasslightly surprised to see her pale even more. "Kathryn, are you all right?"

She nodded slightly, barely making eye contact. If she didn't eat something,he would insist she see the doctor, and that wasn't on her list of things todo. Swallowing the bile rising in her throat, she gave him a weak grin. "Howabout some tomato soup? I'm not up to anything too heavy. You're buyingright?" the grin that appeared was all Janeway. 

Chakotay relaxed at her grin, and headed for the replicator. "Computer, onebowl of plain tomato soup, hot." He picked up the bowl and carried it to her."Here you go, Love." 

As Chakotay placed the bowl before her, the steamy scent of the soup waftedthrough the air. The smell overwhelmed her, and the nausea rose full force.Chakotay stepped back in shock as Kathryn flew from her chair and into thebathroom. The sounds of her retching filled his ears, and he in turn racedinto the room to check on her. With calm concern, he dampened a cloth for herand gently gathered the hair back from her face. Kneeling beside her, heplaced the cloth on the back of her neck and waited patiently for the spasmsto subside. She leaned weakly against him as she tried to catch her breath."If you don't mind, Chakotay, I'm going back to my quarters for a littlewhile. I'm not feeling very well."

"Of course not. Why don't you stop by sickbay and let the doctor take a lookat you."

She shook her head, and slowly pulled herself to her feet. "It's nothingserious, I'm sure. Just a little bug or something."

"Kathryn...."

She held up her hand to stop him. "If I don't feel better in a little while Ipromise to go talk to the doctor."

He expression showed his doubt and concern, and even though he wanted toargue, he backed off and let her have her way. "I'll check on you later,okay?"

She nodded and leaned in to hug him. Frowning in concentration, she headedfor her quarters.

She left the lights off when she got to her cabin and curled up on her sofa,she told herself there was no reason to see the doctor, her stomach wasalready beginning to settle, but she would stay put for a while, just in case.She groaned as she thought of the way Chakotay would be hovering over her forthe next few days. Then she smiled, this was probably a bug, and it wasprobably contagious, meaning, Chakotay would have it soon. She knew it wasawful, but she couldn't wait for him to get it, then she wouldtreat him like a helpless child. Thing was, he'd probably enjoy it.

Chakotay wasn' t surprised when he found her sleeping, actually he felt a lotbetter. She looked a hell of a lot better than she had this morning, she'dgotten her color back, and there was no hint that she'd ever been ill. Hesaid on the edge of the sofa and leaned over her. He smoothed the hair awayfrom her face, "Hey," he whispered, "sleeping beauty, time to get up."

Kathryn moaned, "Mmm, do I have to?" She stretched and threw an arm across herface, he'd turned the lights on.

"Hey, got to join the land of the living," he tugged on a lock of hair. "Howya feeling?"

"Better, it was probably just some temporary thing, it came now its gone."She sat up slowly, not wanting to test her luck. "What time is it?"

She was going to love this, "It's about 1800 hours."

"Dammit! Why didn't you wake me before now?" She got off the sofa and headedfor her desk.

He chuckled, "Because I figured you needed it, and you're just so cute whenyou're sleeping, almost angelic."

She snorted as she pulled up the days log reports, "Why don't you makeyourself useful and give your captain a full report of the days events."

"Well I would, but I'm off duty. And the Captain is off duty also, and sinceshe hasn't felt well all day I don't think its a good idea to bother her withthe boring details." He stood up and walked over, "Besides, we have a dinnerdate with Tom and B'Elanna. Still feel up to it?" 

She took a breath, "Yeah, I'd hate to cancel for something that's not reallyimportant. Besides, I do feel better." She lied, the thought of food had madeher stomach start to churn again, but she was hungry, starving in fact.

"All right, go change, I'll meet you back here in an hour."

She reached up and kissed him on the corner of the mouth, "See you then."

Kathryn smiled as she looked around the room. She, Chakotay, Tom, andB'Elanna were sitting at a cozy table in Sandrine's of all places. Thetable was set for four, with romantic candlelight and soft music playing inthe background. Steamy plates of quiche, and a basket of warm bread sharedthe table with a sparkling synthehol wine. Her initial nausea at the arrivalof the food had quickly been bypassed by ravening hunger. Good friends,conversation, and food, had dispelled the malaise, and Kathryn felt ready totake on the world. She had just taken a bite of her quiche when Tom suddenlychanged the topic of conversation.

"So, Kathryn, I here congratulations are in order."

Kathryn shot him a confused glance. "Pardon?"

"Well, I realize you don't want to officially announce it to the crew and all,but the news is flying all over the ship."

"And that would be what?"

"Well, everyone knows your pregnant. We're just speculating on the due date.Boy or a girl?"

"What!?" The words echoed through the room as both Kathryn and Chakotayshouted them. Chakotay shot Kathryn an angry glare.

Kathryn stared at Tom, "I have no idea what you're talking about, where thehell did you hear that?"

Tom shifted in his seat, "Well its all over the ship, everyone's talking aboutit. There's already been a betting pool set up for the due date and the sex,and when and how it happened."

Kathryn shook her head vigorously, "I'm not pregnant, I have no clue how theygot that." Then she looked at Chakotay who was still glaring at her, "I'mnot!"

He shrugged, "Of course you aren't, its preposterous." He took a sip of wine,wondering if just maybe. It all fit, the nausea, the vomiting, sleeping allafternoon. He couldn't help but wonder, but he couldn't believe she'd lie tohim.

Tom and B'Elanna exchanged knowing glances, it was B'Elanna who spoke up,"Well, you might want to put an end to the rumors, we figured that surely youwould have heard them, whether it was true or not."

Kathryn nodded, "Why don't you two do that." She picked at the food on herplate, her appetite and good mood had drained away. "You know, if you twodon't mind, I think I'm going to call it a night. I have to catch up onreports, and get ready for tomorrow morning's briefing." They stood as shedid, "Chakotay?"

"Right, I'll walk you back. Good night B'Elanna, Tom." He followed her out, afrown etched into his forehead. 

"Goodnight," the younger officers called after them. When the doors had closedafter them B'Elanna hit Tom across the back of the head, "Way to go!"

"What?!" He stared at her in astonishment.

"Hello! It's so obvious, she hasn't told him yet!" B'Elanna rolled her eyesand walked toward the exit, "I swear sometimes you can be so dense."

"What? B'Elanna, you heard her, she wouldn't have lied to us about it."

"She might have, if she wasn't sure what she was going to do yet."

"Surely you don't think..." Tom stared at her as if she'd grown a second head.

"I don't know, who knows what goes on in her head. They never made theirrelationship official, beyond you and I and probably Tuvok no one else hasbeen told. The crew isn't clueless, they both know that, but she's probablybeen stalling."

"I don't know B'Elanna, it just doesn't sound right." He saved the program andfollowed her down the corridor.

"I don't know, maybe it is all a rumor, but why would Chakotay get upset likethat, you saw him, he didn't say a word, and he acted like walking her back toher quarters was a chore."

Tom sighed, "I really don't know."

As the doors to Kathryn's quarters closed, he turned on her. "How could you?I can't believe you wouldn't tell me you were pregnant. It all fits. Thesickness, the sleepiness. What were you thinking?"

"What? Chakotay I..."

He paled suddenly and anger washed across his face. "You didn't tell mebecause you were planning on getting rid of it weren't you? Dammit Kathryn,how could you even consider destroying our child?"

"Would you just stop a minute you idiot? I am not pregnant. It's notpossible. We've both had our boosters. Chakotay, we've never reallydiscussed children. I certainly wouldn't make a life and death decisionconcerning our child without talking to you."

"But your sickness?" He was calming visibly.

"It's just a bug. Nothing to get upset about. If it persists I'll go see thedoc." She moved closer to him, wrapping her arms around his waist. "I loveyou. You're my best friend and my lover. Our future is ours to work out, notyours and not mine, ours. I would love to bear your child, but I don't thinkit's in our best interest to become parents. We have the responsibility ofnearly 150 individuals who need us full time. I can't justify having a childwhen we can't devote ourselves to it."

Chakotay wrapped his arms around her and pulled her tightly to him. "I'msorry I jumped to conclusions. I wanted it to be true so badly that I washurt that you would hide it from me. I should have known that you wouldn't.I should have trusted in our love."

"Yes you should have." Kathryn punched him lightly in the stomach. She buriedher head in his neck, she wanted it to be true as well, but for now it justcouldn't be, someday--maybe. "I've got an idea," she pulled him toward thebedroom.

"Oh?" His eyes gleamed, "I dunno, when you get ideas..."

"Oh well," she shrugged and turned away from him, "if you don't want to stripme naked and take a soak in the tub that's your loss." She looked back overher shoulder when she reached the bedroom door, "You can just let yourselfout, I'll see you in the morning."

"Oh no," he started for her, "I don't think so." She squealed when he threwher over his shoulder and carried her into the bathroom.

"That's more like it," she slapped him on the behind. But there was a thoughtitching in the back of both their minds, and two hearts were aching.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Oh god..." Kathryn slumped against the bulkhead outside the bathroom thatconnected to her ready room. Why couldn't her stomach just behave? A glance atthe chronometer on her desk informed her that it was already 1100 hours, she'dbeen ill three times since awakening that morning. She hated the idea of goingto sickbay, it was her least favorite place, but she couldn't take thisanymore. She didn't bother checking her appearance, but did attempt to steadyherself before walking out onto the bridge. "Commander, you have the bridge."

Chakotay nodded, and frowned, "Aye Captain." He could see she wasn't feelingwell, it bothered the hell out of him. If she wasn't going to sickbay now,he'd drag her down there himself, kicking and screaming if need be.

~~

Kathryn took a breath before entering sickbay, she really wasn't in the moodfor this. "Doctor?" She called out as she crossed the room toward his office.

"Captain, what can I do for you?" He looked up from the report on his desk.

"I haven't been feeling well, you can tell me what it is, then do somethingabout it."

"You know, Captain, if you want a quick fix, you shouldn't wait so long tocome and see me." The Doctor continued his scans.

"Just find out the problem and fix it okay."

"Fine Captain. Your mildly dehydrated from the vomiting. Hormonal levels areoff, and you're pregnant. I can give you something to help with the vomitingand a good dose of vitamins."

He was reaching for the hypospray when his words hit her. "I'm what?"

"You're pregnant Captain, about 8 weeks." 

He pressed the hypo to her neck as she stared at him in mixed wonder andhorror. She couldn't stop herself as hysterical laughter poured from her.The crew knew and suspected before she did. After the conversation she andChakotay had had about children, and the lack thereof, she wasn't certain howto tell him. "How?"

"Really Captain. You are a grown woman. Surely you know how babies arecreated?"

"That's not what I meant Doctor, and you know it. I want to know how this ispossible when both Chakotay and myself have been practicing birth control."

"Well, Captain, as you know, abstinence is the only thing that is a sure firepreventative for pregnancy, even in this day and age. It is quite possiblethat the boosters just didn't take."

Kathryn sighed in frustration as the doctor went into a lecture on prenatalhealth and care. She left the office feeling better physically, and worsementally. There was no doubt in her mind that she wanted Chakotay's child,but after all the arguing and her stand on children, how could she justify it?She couldn't help how she felt. Now, she had to consider the consequences.

Kathryn walked around the ship without any particular destination, letting hermind sort through all the reasons she couldn't have this child, and all thereasons she could. But besides the problems with giving birth to a childaboard Voyager, what was she going to tell Chakotay? He was going to befurious with her she was certain, he'd think she'd lied. Of course she had theDoctor as proof that she hadn't known, but that was beside the point. Hewasn't going to understand, of that she was almost certain.

She was a little surprised when she found she'd stopped walking, she now stoodoutside an office, she took a breath and knocked on the door.

"Captain?" B'Elanna looked up in surprise.

"Got a minute?" Kathryn leaned against the door frame.

"Sure," B'Elanna motioned to the solitary seat opposite her desk. The officewasn't much, but she was grateful for it, it allowed her to work without thehassle of her engineers. "What's up?"

"Well, I kinda wanted to talk to you about last night." Kathryn sat, "I'd liketo completely drop the rank if that's all right, this is personal, and doesn'tgo beyond this office?"

"Of course," Torres leaned forward and rested her elbows on the desk, "what'swrong? I suppose this is about what Tom said? If so we're sorry for puttingyou on the spot."

Kathryn held up a hand, "No, it's all right, the fact is, I wasn't lying lastnight. But I am pregnant, I just saw the doctor. It's really kind of funnythat the crew realized it before I did."

"But?"

Kathryn smiled, "But, I have no clue what to do, or what the hell I'm going totell Chakotay."

"Why? I mean, I really can't see the two of you 'not' wanting a family."

"It's not that, of course we do, its just that with Voyager and the crew--"

"What about them?" B'Elanna practically snorted, "They have nothing to do withyour personal life."

"No, but there are 150 on this ship that count on me, and Chakotay, where am Isupposed to find the time to be a Captain, a mother, and be involved withChakotay."

"You don't, you delegate. That's what Chakotay is there for remember, a childhas two parents, two people who are responsible for creating it. And that'swhy a ship has two people to run it, a Captain and a First Officer."

"I wish it were that easy B'Elanna, and even if it were, what do I tellChakotay? He thought I was lying to him last night, that I had planned not totell him I was pregnant so I could have an abortion, I could never do that.But it doesn't change that he thought that, or that he'll think I was actuallylying to him."

"If he loves you, he won't jump to conclusions, he'll listen to you."

Kathryn sighed, "And if he doesn't?"

"Then he's an idiot and I get to beat him up for you." B'Elanna smiled, "It'llbe all right, you know it, I know it, and he'd better know it."

Kathryn chuckled, "Thanks B'Elanna, I'm still not so sure though." "Well, Iam, listen I have an idea. Tom wants to do that Christmas party thing right?With just the Senior Staff? Tell him then, it still gives you about a week anda half to get things worked out in your head. I think I have an idea of 'how'you can tell him." B'Elanna leaned forward and began outlining her plan.

It didn't take them long to figure it all out, or for Kathryn to get thecourage up. As the week went by she became more excited, though a bit of herstill felt the fear that he wouldn't believe her. But she knew, that if he didlove her, he would believe her, without her having to prove herself to him.

Finally the night arrived, the senior staff would be exchanging gifts, andwith everyone's help, Kathryn was ready. None of Chakotay's gifts had thegiver's name it, as he opened the first one, he was almost positive it wasfrom Kathryn. But with the gift, which was a holovid of his favorite novel,was a note reading *Not this one, its from Tom, try the next...* He sent apuzzled glance in Kathryn's direction, but patiently waited until his turncame around again. Again, he received a gift and a note, he was beginning togrow a bit frustrated, until finally the last gift was handed to him. Kathrynwas sitting with B'Elanna watching, twin smirks lighting up their faces.

As he began tearing the wrapping paper he wondered what on earth Kathryn couldhave gotten him that would need a box this big, it was almost three feet tall,and a foot and a half across. When he opened the box he sighed, within it layanother box. He looked at Kathryn, it was all she could do not to startlaughing. He opened the next box, finding another box, and so it went untilhe finally reached the final box. It wasn't small, about half the size of ashoe box, give or take a few centimeters. He opened it quickly,ripping away the wrapping paper and jerking away the tissue -- then hefrowned. Within it was another note, and a tiny pair of shoes...baby shoes. Heopened the note, "I owe you, one present upon delivery, in approximatelyseven months. Some times it amazes me how intuitive our crew can be. MerryChristmas Daddy, Love Mommy."

He looked up at her, eyes widening, she was smiling at him, tears spilling outof her own eyes. He dropped the box and moved toward her, the rest of thesenior staff politely moving toward the buffet table to allow them a small bitof privacy. He looked down at her, "How?" 

"I don't know, just one of those things I suppose. Chakotay I didn't lie toyou, I swear, I found out the next day in sickbay."

He wiped the tears from her cheeks, "I believe you, I don't believe this, itsso.."

She smiled and rested a hand against his cheek, "I know, are you all rightwith this? I know we hadn't spoken about it--"

"It's all right. If your okay with this then I'm sure not going to complain.Are you okay with this?"

She leaned forward and kissed him lightly on the lips. "I'm not sure of this,but I can't imagine anything I want more besides you."

"I love you, Kathryn. Merry Christmas, my love." Chakotay hugged her tightlyto him as Christmas music filled the air. The song was appropriate he thoughtas the words flowed over him. "All I want for Christmas is you...."